The Top 50 Albums of the Year… #36 HEIDI MONTAG “Superficial”
36. HEIDI MONTAG – Superficial
Heidi deserves her place in my chart this year and, if we’re going by how many times I’ve listened to this album, it should actually probably be higher than Thirty Six.
In 2010, natural beauty Heidi Montag, the humble star of MTV’s “The Hills”, released her debut album. If I believed in such a thing as “guilty pleasures”, than this would probably be one of them. “Superficial” was one of my most played albums of the year; and it really only happened by accident.
Earlier in the year, my BFF Ben (who some of you may know as Ben Atar on Twitter) and I were on an extreme Heidi-google-image-binge one Saturday night. It was a binge that resulted in too many glasses of wine and me ultimately creating a profile for Heidi on Facebook with my surname hyphenated to the end of hers – and then me marrying Heidi via the hilarious relationship function. Somewhere in between all of that was the download of Heidi’s album. It was then played at full volume and on repeat for hours on end as we gorged on all things Heidi.
In retrospect, Heidi’s album of actually really fantastic pop songs was one of those records that was able to put an enormous smile on face whenever I listened to it. And the thing is; if – for example, Britney had released this as her latest album, it would have sold like hot-cakes and spawned at least 5 or 6 fantastic pop singles. For some cruel reason, Montag’s attempts at pop stardom were hindered by – apparently – her being unlikeable. How could you not like her though?! What a face! What a voice!
But seriously, what a collection of songs. There’s stuff on here written by Cathy Dennis for goodness sakes – of course there’s going to be pearler pop moments here! Songs like “Superficial” – an intriguing insight into a complex woman, “Blackout” – a song that deals with the extreme pressures of fame and privacy and is very actually one of the most unreal pop songs of the year, the psychotically awesome “Twisted” (with the records best lyrics – “Twist it light a tourniquet; Tighter! Tighter! Round my neck – It’s not just what you do – it’s lack of all respect! But you won’t let me leave – you want to strangle me!”) and the profanity-fuelled “More Is More” (“It’s fucking chaos in here!!”) are just the tip of a truly poptastic iceberg. “One More Drink” is a story we’ve all more than likely encountered on our drunken nights out, “Look How I’m Doing” is a stomping club track that wouldn’t have been too out-of-place on Paris Hilton’s last album, and the album closer – the aptly named “Love It Or Leave It”, is the perfect tongue-in-cheek sign-off that somebody looking after Heidi needs to be congratulated on.
Voice as thin as rice-paper, but my GOD this brought me a LOT of joy in 2010.