I was lucky enough last week to have a chat with James Cook from Delphic on the old warbler-phone. The Manchester three-piece released their debut album ‘Acolyte’ to glittering reviews, and rightly so. It remains 2010’s first five-star album (review coming tomorrow), and – quite amazingly – chatting to Cook was such a blast that the time flew by and, when it came to an end, it was a little sad to bid my farewell. The guys are touring Australia next week, visit TheirSpace for more details.

Please note that Cook brought up GaGa on his own without my prodding. I was as surprised as you are, and I apologise to those getting sick of reading her name on here but this one was really actually out of my control.

Hello James how are you?!
I’m very well thanks Adem how are you?

Very well thank you! Congrats on the album James, it’s an absolute corker…
(Laughs) Thanks very much, cheers, thank you, it was a long time coming. About two years ago this album was the holy grail, and now we’ve found it, I don’t know if you’ve watched the Indiana Jones movies, but I’m not sure if it’s the little wooden cup with all the gems around it, or the golden cup (laughs).

Is it a giant relief having it out there after all the work and, I guess to an extent, the hype you’ve faced?
Oh yeah totally, it’s really important for us to get it off of our chests and to kind of be able to forget about it. I think we were perhaps luckier than, say, Ellie Goulding or Marina & The Diamonds who topped the BBC list, at the time that the polls came out they still hadn’t finished their albums. So were fortunate in a way that, around October last year we’d actually finished the album, it was off of our chests, gone, we had nothing more to write, nothing more to worry about, and we could just leave that all with our team to either deal with the hype, or pursue or forget about the hype, and we could just get on with gigging, touring and writing again. It was a real relief to get it done and dusted, and I’m glad we didn’t have any more to write come January!

You came third in the BBC SOUND OF 2010 list – did that put some pressure on you, or was it just really an afterthought because you’d already finished everything?
It’s obviously really nice to be apart of it, because what we’ve realised also after speaking to a lot of press from around the world, is that it’s a real global thing, the BBC tips. And, over the last couple of years you’ve had some amazing artists on the list, Lady GaGa last year was Number 6 – she should have been higher actually, how amazing is that woman?

VERY!! Very amazing yes!
(Laughs) Florence + The Machine was number 3 last year and she’s done fantastically well, at least in the UK anyway. I think the problem with it is, is that it puts too much pressure on those that are first and second. First last year was LIttle Boots, and she had quite an aggressive campaign, but unfortunately it hasn’t really paid off for her, I feel really sorry for her actually because it’s quite unfortunate that’s happened. And it’s because there’s so much hype that surrounds these artists, and people in the UK and all over the world don’t really like being told what artists they have to listen to (laughs), and that’s what I kinda feel some people might think the BBC are telling them. This year I feel that same pressure may apply to Ellie Goulding and Marina, who are both fantastic in their own fields, but it’s the pressure you know. As for us though, we’re quite isolated, we come from Manchester and not from hustle-and-bustle of London. We trot down there and do what we need to do every so often, but we’re not really that fussed about it (laughs). We’ve got a team that sort of take care of that hype and take the pressure off us so we can do what we prefer to do, which is write.

You worked with Ewan Pearson on the record – how was that?
Ewan’s been, I think named, I don’t think there’s been an actual award for this but perhaps there should be, but he’s been named the most charming man in Dance music. (Laughs) He certainly is very charming, he’s a lovely looking guy too, a really level headed chap who, when we started recording with him, brought us together, our intentions and relationships were quite fraught at that time because, we’d gone through a five or six month ordeal of trying to do everything ourselves or with producers that didn’t quite work out, so we’d been in the studio for quite a while and gone through lots of different visions of ‘Delphic’. And for one reason or another, even though we were with some fantastic producers, it didn’t really work, it didn’t sound like what we thought Delphic should sound like. So we came out of the back of that, and there was a lot of tension between us, and Ewan dedicated enough time to each of us to really kind of manage us and put us in a place where we could really focus and have that vision, see it through. But on top of that, his fantastic production techniques! He’s got real a slick aesthetic to the way he does things, that really helped with the album because a lot of the things we were doing, they weren’t as refined as we would have liked them to be, we didn’t know how to achieve it, and maybe some of the things we were doing sounded slightly dated, so he was this contemporary force that could just push the album into 2010, as well as the extensive back catalogue of what he listens to, he’s a really important guy to have in the studio and it was a pleasure to work with him.

Is the ace “Halcyon” named in homage to the Orbital track of the same name?
(Laughs) We absolutely adore that track. It’s not a direct homage, it’s something that was an additional homage, I guess, it was a word that we’d found and we were like, look, we do know that this is a very similar title to “Halcyon + on + on” by Orbital, can we get away with this, can we do it? And we just decided one day, what the hell, we love that track and we love the title, let’s just run with it and see how we get on. But all of us though, Orbital were a massive, massive influence, and it was an absolute pleasure to tour with them back in the UK, probably around this time last year, we did a few gigs with them, it was so incredible to sort of see our healers in action (laughs).

Orbital were actually in Melbourne a few weeks ago and I got to see them live, it was pretty incredible.
Really?! They were in Melbourne?! Wow, did they play “Satan”?

Yes, yes they did!
(Laughs) Right, excellent! That is one of our favourites, we all loved it when they played that tune. It’s such a dark tune!

There are some truly big, uplifting moments and build ups, and an effortless crossover between dance and rock throughout the album, would you say dance music played an integral part in the formation of the album?
Oh yeah, 100%, and on many different levels as well. One of the first things we had to contend with was how we were going to put these songs across live, even before any real thoughts of how we were going to record it. How are we going to start getting these songs out there? And one of these things that we do when we play live is put a set together like a continuous DJ set, similar to how Orbital would do it or how The Chemical Brothers would do it. And that’s because we were listening to a lot of their live shows, and we went to watch The Chemical Brothers back in about 2008, and it was something that really inspired us and we thought, well, we can do this too you know? We hate all the innate banter that some bands have between songs on stage, so why not treat it like a real DJ set and have about 45 minutes of an absolute rave-up. I should probably mention Daft Punk were a huge influence on us as well. But on a very basic level, we’d come out of a Battle of the Bands, and we just naturally found ourselves sort of eating into synthesizers. And when you’re working more with synths and drum machines, you naturally drift towards dance music to inspire yourself with what sounds you’re going to make and what’s current, and we were listening to a helluva lot more band-dance music, but also a lot more of the European compilations such as the Compact compilations. We were listening to a lot of Techno, minimal techno and tech-house, it was important because we were really immersing ourselves in that life. At a similar time, the Warehouse Project, which is a clubnight in Manchester, started putting on nights more frequently, and all the DJs from around the world kinda transcend on the city in this disused car-park from about 10pm in the evening through till 6am in the morning, and that’s right where we live so we were there each night of the weekend, really just immersing ourself in the dance culture. The sense of euphoria that we got from those nights was something we really wanted to capture on the album. One night in particular, which we all remember quite well, we were at this unplanned rave at an indoor skate park in Manchester. The DJ was playing and suddenly he dropped this minimal techno choon that we’d never heard before, and the feeling of euphoria, we just had to leave right there and capture it to put something similar on the album, something that gave us the similar effect. The more we jumped into the dance world, the more we embraced it. And that sense of euphoria is something we try to stick to not only on the album but also through our live show.

James, thank you so much for the chat it’s been an absolute pleasure…
No Adem, thank you!

It’s been a number of years since the whole world was talking about a music video clip as much as they have been GaGa’s “Telephone”. And whilst it may not exactly have anything on the superior “Bad Romance” video before it, it still offers up a whole lot more than almost any video clip being force-fed to us today, let alone the last few years.

We seem to be living in the age where music videos are an event once again, or, rather, and perhaps more specifically to the point, Lady GaGa’s videos are now an event. It’s something it seems everyone is interested in seeing; to the fans, the casual music listener, even the haters and people who listen to “real (boring) music”. The “real music” listeners watch it with gusto so they can bitch and moan later about how awful it and pop music is and why we should treat all pop stars like Hitler treated the Jews. In order to make such outlandish claims like this to match their super-tight black jeans and matching Libertines t-shirt, they’ve got to see the film clip so it looks like they have some kind of Indie leg to stand on during arguments with people like me about the video. At the end of the day though, they’ve sat down and watched that video clip, knowing full well they’re going to hate it. How long has it been since a pop star has been able to achieve that, and on a global level? You have to give GaGa kudos for that alone.

The near-10-minute epic extravaganza is, from the horses mouth, a social commentary on the American obsession with consumerism. But there’s some wild pop culture references sprinkled throughout too that are more than worthy of being mentioned. The use of Uma Thurman’s stolen ‘Pussy Wagon’ from Kill Bill was a direct loan to GaGa from Quentin Tarantino and drives the obvious mark Tarantino’s movies made on GaGa throughout the spliced-up-wonderment of “Telephone”, Beyonce’s nickname of “Honey Bee” also being a reference to “Honey Bunny” from Pulp Fiction, to the leopard-skin costume worn toward the end which seems to pay direct homage to the movies of John Waters and his cross-dressing star Divine.

The clip seems to have strum up some controversy, MTV have actually banned the video. Everything from the ‘lesbian’ kiss, a censored snapshot of GaGa’s Vadge and the death of an entire diner all playing a part. But that hasn’t stopped the drove of millions logging onto YouTube every day to watch it in high definition on their computers. The only thing MTV have really been relevant for in the last 5 years has – let’s face it – been “The Hills”, and the fact that they’ve banned the music video, in the digital age we live in now, means fuck-all what it used to back when artists NEEDED MTV to show their clips. It’s not detrimental any more and I find it funny how the media have, naturally, jumped all over the banning like it is of some actual relevance.

As for the video itself, obviously I really like it. The real surprise is just how much of a great actress Beyonce really is; she obviously follows instruction incredibly well – every scene she is in – absolute gold. This video has made her instantly more likeable to those of us who’ve perhaps been a little unimpressed by her output of late. She completely got it; there’s nothing that comes across as forced from her either which only adds to the charm of this video.

Kudos to Jonas Akerlund, the director, for doing such a stellar job too. There are moments, in particular when Beyonce is in a bedroom, alone, and GaGa in her jail cell, where the special effects and – to a point – even the placement of things around the room remind me very heavily of this Madonna video, also directed by Akerlund. Some might say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but I actually enjoyed seeing Beyonce’s head being twisted to-and-fro ala Madonna in “The Beast Within.”

Some criticism has been made that the clip has nothing to do with the actual song. And whilst I agree to a point that it’s a little disappointing, it’s certainly not as disappointing as it would have been had we been given some stock-standard boring video clip set in a nightclub. I’m falling asleep just thinking about it now.

It might be an over-the-top vanity affair here, but who cares? Why are we lashing out at Pop Stars – of all people – for being vain if this is the kind of final product we’re going to get from them? Maybe there’s a line blurred with the degree of Vanity GaGa puts forward in her work and the degree of vanity every other pop star puts forward that people just can’t quite differentiate between. Luckily for them, it doesn’t look like GaGa’s going anywhere anytime soon so, perhaps, they’ll get to see that line for themselves and finally get it.

Whether you love her or hate her, love the clip or despise it, chances are you’ve seen it in full by now, and you’ve probably seen it more than once too. Anyhow, why not watch it again?

Incredible.

There are so many musical thoughts that end up on Twitter that, if I weren’t so lazy, could probably be extended into slightly longer paragraphs on the blog. I caught myself spending too much time on Twitter again this week when I could have been blogging. NO MORE!

There are things I really want to talk about, like the new Sophie Ellis-Bextor Song of the Year “Bittersweet”, or the amazing new album from Delphic (among other things I’ve got almost ready to go), but in the meantime, there’s all of this that’s going through my head.

The new Groove Armada album “Black Light” is quite rapidly going from being a three-and-a-half-star album to a near five-star one. It seems to be the most consistent album from them to date; “Look Me In The Eye Sister” is like 60’s psychedelia meets trance, “I Won’t Kneel” featuring SaintSaviour is one of their best singles so far, and Will Young (who’s still looking mighty fine and was tops in Skins, wasn’t he?) collaboration “History” and the Fenech Sole “Paper Romance” are actually perfect, aren’t they? Top stuff, I should do a proper review of it soon actually.

The debut Cassette Kids album is also incredible and, I think, will surprise a few of their doubters. Quality from start to finish, review and A NEW interview with the guys coming soon. Also, the new Rogue Traders single “Would You Raise Your Hands?” goes to radio tomorrow morning from 7AM – you’ll finally all get to hear what I’ve been banging on about for so long. It’s tops, can’t wait for everyone else to be in love with it too.

Telephone tomorrow. OMG…

The new MGMT single song abortion is so all over the place that I barely got through the whole thing. 4 minutes and 16 seconds should not feel like a really disjointed 40 minute megamix gone horribly wrong. It’s like they had 10 really good (unfinished) ideas for some great songs, and just put it all together in one. Disappointing. Make your own judgements on it though, it’s available – legally – for free over here.

The same goes for the brand new Princess Superstar single, “Ground Control.” I have a really big gripe with people whispering; it’s not a pretty sound but can be carried off quite well in very small doses in some pop songs. Every verse in this however is whispered. It grates so much that you’re just waiting eagerly for the chorus, but then – of course – it really doesn’t feel like it was worth the wait al all. And the wait has been five years for new material from this lady. It’s really upsetting because I have loved EVERYTHING she’s done in the past and not just the highly underrated “My Machine” LP from 2005. She’s an incredible entertainer live and has the smarts to pen a perfect song. Unfortunately, this is far from perfect, but I’m hoping there’s a lot more to her upcoming album “The Next Evolution” than this insinuates. Also being offered as a free download on her MySpace, if you’re interested. Immediately after you hear it for yourself, listen to this, or this, and tell me that I’m not disappointed for a reason. She doesn’t need to make an electro-fused record for me to be happy, it just needs to be good.

The new Sugababes album, “Shit 7″… I don’t think I need to say any more actually.

Blog-commenter J responded to my Ke$ha/3OH!NO remark on last weeks eTunes post by offering a link to a Ke$ha-only, 3OH-FREE version of “Blah Blah Blah.” Thank GOD. Find it here… Thanks J!

There’s a lot going on at the moment in regards to the closure of BBC’s 6 Music radio station, and whilst I’m not going to even attempt to talk about (Popjustice have done a pretty good job of that, here, here and here), it reminded me a little of the near-10-year battle Hitz FM suffered through when it was running for a full time license in Melbourne between the years of 1992 and 2001. You can read more about the station (which was never granted that full time broadcasting license) here, it pretty much cemented my passion for dance music and radio during my ‘formative years’ and the uproar being caused RE: the 6 Music closure has just brought all of those incredible, but now somewhat upsetting, memories back.

Cheryl Tweedy chose her words incorrectly during an International TV appearance and scared the shit out of hundreds of millions of their fans. It’s all been cleared up now (Cheryl’s NOT leaving Girls Aloud, nor has she left), but I really feel like we’ve gotten to a point where I almost couldn’t care less about any more Cheryl material OR Nadine’s new album because it’s all just getting in the way of having my 2010 Album of the Year picked out for me in the form of a Girls Aloud release. Bitches I am OVER this shit.

It’s been 10 years since The Avalanches released their debut album “Since I Left You”. Preposterous. Get on with it boys, who do you think you are, Kate Bush? If only it had been a 10 year wait in between Wolfmother albums… Aah yes, what a simpler world it would be.

It’s all (seemingly!) clear now though, and to break the on-off drought permanently, I present to you a list of 21 songs currently burning a hole in the Auxilary chord connected to my iPod…

GEORGE MICHAEL I Want Your Sex
So on Wednesday night I went along with the fabulous Glenn of Stale Popcorn and his equally as fabulous Mother to the final ever George Michael concert in Melbourne (full report on that coming Monday), and whilst George didn’t perform this particular song (or my other favourite, “Praying For Time”, but more on that Monday), that hasn’t stopped me from absolutely BLARING this track several times in a day since the show. Probably the best song written about sex ever.

WHAM! Wham! Rap (Album Version)
I know he probably has no interest in rapping on stage now that he’s Not 18, but I would have given my soul for even a verse from this classic.

DAN BLACK Get Into Cloudbusting
Found via the magnificent XOlondon, this fuses the music of my favourite Kate Bush song, “Cloudbusting”, with Black singing the lyrics of Madonna’s “Into The Groove.”

MATT VAN SCHIE ft. MICHAEL DI FRANCESCO Journey
Lush/dreamy electropop from Van She bassist, Matt Van Schie. His solo EP, “Balmy Nights”, is out now via iTunes. Full review of that and an interview with the man coming next week. This particular track features Van She keyboardist Michael Di Francesco and a video clip for this should be surfacing soon.

DELPHIC Acolyte
I was lucky enough to speak to Delphic’s frontman James Cook earlier this week and what started off as a chat about their incredible debut album turned into a dance music geek-fest. Which couldn’t have made me happier. The title track from their album is what you’d call a 100% all-out euphoric dance ANTHEM. There is no doubt these guys are ahead of the game when it comes to this supposed “indie-dance” genre they’ve been tagged with. But fuck that; the album is a truly stand-out dance record that just happens to have some vocals and a few guitars in it. I’m so sick of that term “indie” these days and tend to be more and more put-off it by the minute. Anyway, that interview and the album review also coming next week.

DELPHIC Counterpoint
During the creation of their debut album, Delphic were heading out to raves and dance parties across the UK, listening to underground techno and minimal techno, “among others”, gathering inspiration for their super-euphoric music. Clever. Instead of just claiming to be inspired by dance music, these guys actually got amongst it.

GABRIELLA CILMI Love Me Coz You Want To
This is beyond remarkable. For those of you who were keen on Gab’s new single “On A Mission”, chances are you’ll be salivating once you’ve heard this. A true disco/electropop classic already, its shimmering chorus is the kind of catchy that will leave you a little mesmerised after it finishes. And just when you think it can’t get any better, the final minute comes along and changes things – wonderfully – quite out of nowhere. And this is the one produced by herself and her band – no other outside work! My favourite track of Gab’s by far, I’ll be posting the interview I did with her the other week sometime in the next few days too.

DIANA VICKERS The Boy Who Murdered Love
Out of all the tracks from Diana’s album sampler, this is the one that has GIANT HIT written all over it. That chorus is super-infectious: “Shot! Shot! Shot! Like a bullet! Stop! Stop! Stop!” Who knows what the rest will sound like, but for this, Vickers gets an A+.

ELLIE GOULDING This Love (Will Be Your Downfall)
I’ve no idea what Ellie’s done to “Guns + Horses” on the new album. The updated version has stripped back a lot of the emotion and replaced it with electronic sounds and, for me, it just doesn’t feel right. I’ll stick to the original thanks, the new version in comparison just feels really devoid of any raw honesty to it which was the reason I loved the song so much. Meanwhile, the rest of the album is as fantastic as everyone has been saying – this track in particular being the absolute highlight.

THE GOLDEN FILTER Hide Me
This is a truly sublime disco stomper with a gorgeous vocal from one of my favourite dancepop acts around at the moment. Their (incredibly long awaited) debut album Voluspa is released in April and will probably feature in many hipster ‘end-of-year’ lists if Filter’s past output is anything to go by.

PARRALOX x AIRA MITSUIKI Time To Say  Goodbye Darling
I somehow completely overlooked (what I now know is) the amazing Parralox album from last year “State Of Decay” – certainly not on purpose because I adored their debut, “Electricity”, but rather from being an absolute lazy prick/somewhere else for most of last year. Anyway, Japanese artist OXY took a collection of the acts tracks and bootlegged them with other brilliant moments in electro. This is one of the crowning moments. Download the EP in full and for free from Parralox’s MySpace.

RAY & ANITA (formerly 2 UNLIMITED) In Da Name Of Love (Extended Version)
To really capture the magic of this track, you need to hear the Extended Version. 2 Unlimited songs always made more sense to me in their full, un-radio edited versions and Ray & Anita’s return is no exception. Poor Anita has been diagnosed with breast cancer but is reportedly fighting on, even donning a wig in the so brilliantly-cheap-and-expensive-at-the-same-time video clip. Get well soon and welcome back! Unfortunately I can’t find the Extended version on YouTube, but keep an eye out for it…

MEN Off Our Backs
I’ve had this on every playlist I’ve made thus far in 2010. There you go. JD Samson of the incredible Le Tigre is one third of this bonza act.

CELINE DION Eyes On Me
I saw Celine Dion’s amazingly crazy tour documentary “Celine: Through The Eyes Of The World” at the movies last week and, I gotta say, it’s worth the admission price alone for this. It’s a clip of Celine doing a five-minute-run-through of her 2 hour live show. The whole thing is delightfully bonkers, Celine even pretends she’s a horse at one point, but it actually gets even CRAZIER from the 2:25 mark. That incredible noise she’s making with her tongue/amazingness was inspired by this song, which was my favourite from Celine’s 2008 album “Taking Chances” (and, FYI, features Delta Goodrem on backing vocals.)

ROBYN No Hassle
Robyn seems to have stuck to her word on making 90’s-influenced dance music with this absolute Ace Of Base/reggae flavoured dancefloor throwback. Produced by Diplo, whose stuff for Kelis’ new album I’m incredibly keen to hear.

LIVVI FRANC Automatik
Thanks to the gorgeous (except when he’s laying into my poor Cheryl!) Mike Wass from PopTrashAddicts, I am completely addicted to this song. Sure, it’s a RedOne/GaGa ripoff, but here’s a newsflash: I like GaGa and RedOne, so the more rip-off’s, the less anxious I will be waiting for The GaGa’s third album. I LOVE the chorus, fucking goes off.

MARINA & THE DIAMONDS Oh No!
I’ll finally be reviewing Marina’s album next week, but this track is not only my favourite but comes complete with the records best lyric: “TV taught me how to feel, now real life has no appeal.”

KE$HA Blah Blah Blah
Yeah, I hated this originally but the video clip won me over. What a skank! Could do without those 3OH!3 cunts though, they really are a bunch of giant fuckwits, aren’t they.

LADY GAGA Bad Romance (Monster Ball Studio Version)
I found this (possibly fan-made?) studio version on the incredible GaGaDaily’s stupendously grand GaGaBoards. Visit, join, etc.

HOLE Skinny Little Bitch
Courtney is back and I love love love. “Oh baby just go slower, oh baby just go lower” … And then everything goes incredibly fast and nuts and OH MY GOD A NEW HOLE ALBUM IN APRIL. If you’re quick, you can download the MP3 for free from the bands official website.

DONKEYBOY ft. LINNEA DALE Ambitions
What a terrible name for a seemingly great band. The show is completely stolen by 19 year old Linnea Dale in the chorus, who has the voice of a seasoned vocalist in her late 20’s/early 30’s. Remarkable. I definitely want to see and hear more of her, and would not object to Donkeyboy hiring her as their new co-vocalist and re-recording their album with her.

WHITNEY HOUSTON Nothin’ But Love
I’ve also been hammering her cover of “Song For You” and “Step By Step”. AND ALSO TOO, POOR WHITNEY. She’s been copping a lot of flack on her Australian Tour these last couple of weeks (which I’m sadly missing due to a lack of funds), but Whitney, I ain’t got nothin’ but, nothin’ but love for ya (eei-ah-ma-ma.) And just in case you missed it, proper-amazing star-in-the-making Meece is BEYOND Chris Crocker in this incredible video…

I’m not sure I trust Alison behind the wheel of a truck, but isn’t her Disco Rocket spectacular?!

Pretty damn fabulous video clip.

GOLDFRAPP | MySpace Music Videos

The most incredible thing I have ever loaded on The Internet.

“The Living Dress”, launched by The Haus of GaGa last night in Liverpool. Picture taken from the incredible GaGa Daily.

This morning a third GaGa show went on sale in Melbourne and, naturally, seeing as I was broke when the first two went on sale, I was going to be all up in that third shows shit and get me some tickets.

Then the unthinkable happened. The Ticketek website began to lag heavily from 9AM onward.  Waves of panic saw me get in my car, race down to the nearest (not very) Ticketek outlet only to be told there were two seats left up in the very back row.

I’d hate to say that, at this time, had I been armed with a handgun, I would have shot the Ticket clerk lady or pretty much anyone who even looked in my general direction. I went from a wave of angry to deliriously upset (much like Geri Halliwell’s infamous outburst in Richard X’s automobile) in a matter of seconds. “What would I do?” I asked myself, locked in my car imagining Annie singing “Me Plus One” at me as a taunt through my window.

There seemed to be only one logical option, and that was – obviously – fly interstate and see her perform at a show I COULD get tickets to. And that’s exactly what myself and my school-yard best mates, Ben and Michelle, will be doing March the 27th. Flying to Brisbane to see GaGa because we would not be put in a fucking nosebleed seat. I’ve only ever traveled interstate for Grace Jones and would imagine the only other person/s I’d do it for are Madonna and Girls Aloud, so this isn’t exactly a decision that’s been made lightly.

Sure, it’s going to be great to go on this semi-holiday, but – to quote Celine Dion – at what cost? My friends and I now have to come up with a few hundred dollars to get flights to and from Brisbane. We have to think of a hire car, where we’re going to sleep. If we had tickets to the Melbourne show, we’d be paying $30 for Gas, $10 for parking, and our beds would have been a 45 minute drive from the concert venue. That’d all come in real handy seeing as I’ve got about 20 cents to my name and saving for a trip to Brisbane wasn’t at the top of my “need to pay for” list.

Ticket scalpers have made this impossible for me to achieve.

Not surprisingly at all, within minutes of tickets being sold out they were plastered all over eBay at a ridiculously over-priced cost. These tickets were $89 RRP, and yet there are people selling tickets (in incredibly large quantities) for double and, in some cases, triple the price. I might as well fly interstate!

It’s getting beyond the joke. This happens with every major artists tour in Australia and, I’m guessing, the world over too. These cunts are making a profit – A PROFIT! – off desperate fans like myself who will go to great lengths just to see a concert they’ve been working themselves up over for months.

How is this not illegal? Or IS it illegal and it’s just not something that’s enforced? I can understand that eBay is an excellent tool if you need to get rid of a concert ticket because you’re no longer going and – sure! – notch on an extra ten or twenty bux and make a bit of cheeky cash off it, but to clear almost $200 profit on something that cost you $89 is BEYOND absurd.

Absolute fucking bullshit.

THAT SAID – I AM GOING TO GAGA, AND I WILL BE AT THE VERY FRONT OF THAT STAGE EVEN IF I HAVE TO BEAT PEOPLE OUT OF MY WAY TO GET THERE.

Please see the seating arrangement below for how the order of the day will be upon arrival for myself, Ben and Michelle.

FUCK. YES.